Subject: The Oxford Dictionary's latest definition

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The Oxford Dictionary's latest definition of the
& b# [3 @* I5 H; lfollowing words.


$ x% y5 {2 x7 ?0 S; J9 n) L! X/ a*Divorce:
*Future tense of marriage*

' r5 Z7 w: O. `, GCigarette:
3 B9 J+ A  C8 f& M" T; B*A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire
6 [  s, z- N$ l  l! Zat one end and a fool on the other. *

Lecture:
, _, C6 j, |0 Q+ R*An art of transferring information from the
notes of the lecturer to the notes of the
, V- f* h, o% r$ D8 _students without passing through the minds
of either.*
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0 s5 p+ n$ w: `5 b. f- G) q& VCompromise:
*The art of dividing a cake in such a way that
everybody believes he got the biggest piece.*

Tears:
*The hydraulic force by which masculine will-power
is defeated by feminine water power.*
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9 E* e0 }' H% k4 k) U) p2 F8 H
Dictionary:
*A place where success comes before work.*

Conference Room:
*A place where everybody talks, nobody listens
and everybody disagrees later on.*
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Classic:
*A book which people praise, but do not read.*

Smile:
*A curve that can set a lot of things straight.*


) o5 \+ e* S2 o/ Q" A5 H. n0 D9 [Office:
*A place where you can relax after your strenuous home
" D: z2 y) f; {3 Ylife.*

Yawn:
0 x8 F1 g, j/ G9 \; V1 J*The only time some married men ever get to open their
mouth.*


; x8 ^2 x7 ^$ h4 r7 C1 o! BEtc:
*A sign to make others believe that you know more than
: q) f# r: w8 ~/ F$ Z$ n" M' ?you actually do.*
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Committee:
4 f1 v! h/ w8 A*Individuals who can do nothing individually and
2 E& N. O" A/ G5 D3 Ysit to decide that nothing can be done together.*

6 G5 M+ N/ Y, I3 ]/ d0 V* ^2 mExperience:
/ f1 \! ^; ^% p* E  X2 E% G*The name men give to their mistakes.*
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Atom Bomb:
*An invention to end all inventions.*

Philosopher:
, @" y$ ]8 G9 a*A fool who torments himself during life, to be
spoken of when dead.*
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Diplomat:
*A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way
  D- H2 y* @( w6 R4 Ithat you actually look forward to the trip.*
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" j" u5 |1 {5 a  p% |1 I" [Opportunist:
*A person who starts taking a bath if he accidentally
falls into a river.*
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+ T, Z  o0 f" B- C; B& k- jOptimist:
8 u/ p2 Z, Q1 ]*A person who while falling from Eiffel tower says in
midway 'See I am not injured yet!!' *


Miser:
*A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.*
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Father:
( z7 {: |$ M% |: o3 W*A banker provided by nature.*

4 c5 O) m8 j* |5 T, H
- \4 k* j/ Q. y" ~# a+ ?' ECriminal:
/ X- I! s; U$ G" c& K*A guy no different from the rest...except that he got
caught.*
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1 R! v% ]8 k8 k, p* k, J0 |Politician:
*One who shakes your hand before elections and your
confidence after.*

8 a) p* n. {, @4 |
9 k2 s( z) [  gDoctor:
: ?+ _, R$ U* Q1 b6 `7 ]" W*A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills
$ C3 O! I! `8 x& Gyou with his bills.*
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6 y% C2 m# B8 oBoss:
*Someone who is early when you are late and late
3 x+ h- L9 w9 j& H4 j* V- Awhen you are early.*

samsammi

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Arterix

ROTFL!!!!
I love it, the English humour!
% N( Q3 V% [; q( a% K4 W6 GSo black!

吉粒粒

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