Good News and Bad News

tommy-chen

:D 看到一个笑话,让大家也乐乐
- ^" Z' y  C3 W1 BThe soldiers had been marching and fighting,they were very dirty ,hot and tired.
& v5 W! J) s0 \" {" G0 [' mOne day,the General announced:"My men,I have some good news and some bad news for you
& v* X" c% x0 D! awhich one would you like first?" "the good news!" they all shouted. "OK." said the General "the good
news is that you will  each be receiving a complete change of clouthing"
4 ]# D3 J, f7 C  y+ W"Hurrah!"chorused the soldiers."and now for the bad news,Jack,you will change with John.John,you will change
$ I% k! l' X3 M: E- N# n% zwith Tom.Tom,you will change with***.and *** will change with .......

goldfish

A man drinks a shot of whiskey every night before bed.
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) u& X8 t- t) ?  K) j; a9 z4 hAfter years of this the wife wants him to quit, so she gets two shot glasses, fills one with water the other with whiskey.
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3 x1 H& R7 T! n2 s0 W7 w; ?She gets him to the table with the glasses and has his bait box there too.
" V0 d  X. G8 y) B  R4 |0 l8 W9 DShe says "I want you to see this."
She puts a worm in the water it swims around.
She puts a worm in the whiskey and the worm dies.

Sternly the wife remarks, "So what do you have to say about this experiment?"
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Cooly the husband replies, "If I drink whiskey, I won't get worms!"

tommy-chen

我也刚看到一个,顶楼上!!

9 |# @, s0 K& C  Y( `( o" Z0 b% xohye$ok$ ,再来一个
一位来自日本的旅客，坐出租车去机场的路上，看到一辆汽车经过，就说：“oh，TOYOTA！Made in Japan! It is very fast！”又有一辆经过，他又说： “oh，NISSAN！Made in Japan! It is very fast！”司机有点不高兴，觉得他太吵了！当第三辆经过时，他还是说：“oh，HONDA！Made in Japan! It is very fast！”

后来到了机场，那个日本人就问：“How Much？”出租车司机说：“1000！”

! \% E7 `9 o$ X% w% t9 y8 u日本人惊奇的问司机：“为什么那么贵？”出租车司机回答说：“oh，mileometer（计 程表）！Made in Japan! It is very fast！”
5 J4 a) h; f# h' g5 C:D :D :D

tommy-chen

中国建设银行——CBC (Construction Bank of China) ——“存不存？”
中国银行　　——BC （Bank of China）——“不存。”
, ~$ R) d3 l" ]  g中国农业银行——ABC (Agriculture Bank of China)— —“啊，不存”
% H& l' s9 O4 I4 ?0 D* a1 B6 w5 p2 T中国工商银行——ICBC (Industry and Commercial Ba nk of China)——“爱存不存”
: b( Y$ g! L1 z. C" j招商银行　　——CMBC——“存吗？？白痴！”
兴业银行　　——CIB——“存一百”
+ a( Z$ ~* k/ E北京市商业银行——BCCB (Beijing City Commercial B ank)——白存存不？”
$ e  V9 M4 K( {2 E2 f0 |汇丰银行　　——（HSBC）还是不存”